[pwaxen@yahoo.com]

This story makes a reference to "Element of Danger," but it probably won't make much difference if you didn't read it as long as you understand that Janeway and Seven are in love.

Disclaimer: The characters of Star Trek: Voyager are the property of Paramount Pictures. This story is written in the spirit of Voyager fandom. No infringement is intended.

Warning: This story depicted two women in love. If this offends you or you are too young or it's just plain illegal on your part of the planet, do not proceed.

Please do not archive, link to or reproduce this story without author's consent.

Element of Choice

by Vaxen (pwaxen@yahoo.com)

"When the Braxid told me about these caverns, it sounded like a myth," Janeway marveled as she gazed in awe at the ceiling.

"The Borg considered them irrelevant. They have little interest in planetary exploration and even less interest in aesthetics" Though not as overwhelmed as her captain, Seven was impressed by the formation.

"They called them the Celestial Caverns and now I understand why."

The entrance to the cavern had been ordinary. Without the Braxid's instructions, they might have missed or ignored it. The cave leading into the cavern was narrow and long. Janeway and Seven had walked and squeezed through half a kilometer of steadily descending passage before it opened on the large cavern. Size was not what made it special. Its most remarkable property could only be appreciated when the lamps were turned off. Instead of being thrown into the total darkness one would expect that deep underground, here and there the ceiling of the cavern glowed as if someone had planted pale spotlights in it. The rock formations around these glowing spots were softly curved and the light reflecting off them gave the illusion of clouds. Small chips of highly reflective stone, like diamonds imbedded among the clouds, twinkled like stars. The full effect was one of a night sky covered in tunnels made from light and clouds.

"I wonder if it's natural," said Janeway. Seven flipped open a tricorder, but Janeway put her hand across it. "Not yet, I'd like to use the input of my own senses before I reduce it to the quantifiable content of a tricorder data file. There's no hurry. Remember, we're on shore leave for the next three days. This isn't an away mission." She turned her torch on and scanned it across one of the bright spots. The illusion of a deep tunnel collapsed in on itself leaving only gray rock with a white smudge in the middle of it. She turned off the torch and the ceiling slowly resolved back into billowing tunnels of light. "Amazing!"

"It is quite remarkable," Seven concurred, her fingers itching to return to the tricorder. While she appreciated Janeway's sense of beauty, Seven hadn't had much success developing one of her own. It was constantly being overwhelms by her pragmatic nature and scientific curiosity.

"Go ahead," Janeway said with a smile, "take your readings. I'm going to explore." She left Seven to decipher her flashing lights and data streams and climbed up on a shelf, which enabled her to touch the cloud-rocks. As the torch had indicated, it had much less depth than the illusion. It felt no different than the other cave walls.

"There is no difference," Seven commented when Janeway told her, "and it is a natural phenomenon, although as yet I am unable to determine how it occurs."

"I wish I could get a closer look at one of those white smudges. What I need is an anti-grav unit." She tapped her commbadge. "Janeway to transporter room." There was no answer. "Janeway to bridge." No answer.

"You signal is being absorbed by the rock. It can not penetrate to the surface."

Janeway jumped off the ledge. A misstep caused her ankle to turn and she careened against a bolder, catching herself in time to prevent any serious damage. "Damn, I'm getting more clumsy all the time. The other day, I almost fell into the warp core."

"Kathryn?" Seven eyed her with concern.

"It sounds worse than it was. Fortunately, there was a crewman there, Tannon, caught me just in time."

"I must remember to thank Crewman Tannon."

"I'll go up the passage and see if I can raise them. Be back as soon as I can."

Seven returned to her investigation. A few minutes later she heard an ominous rumbling sound from the direction of the passage and turned just in time to see Janeway's body fly from the opening and land hard on the cavern floor. Seven rushed to help her.

"Kathryn, are you alright?"

Janeway gasped for breath, unable to answer, but laid a reassuring hand on the arms that enfolded her. Once she got her breathing under control she said, "I got the wind knocked out of me. I was on my way up the passage when I realized I could use the tricorder to boost my signal -- maybe save myself from climbing all the way up -- then I remembered I left it down here. I think there was a cave-in." Janeway tried to get up, but a sharp pain seized her side. Seven eased her back down, then retrieved her abandoned tricorder and checked the Captain. A shadow fell across her face.

"This tricorder is inefficient. Without a medical tricorder, it is difficult to ascertain your condition."

"Seven, I've never known you to lie, but I know that you're not telling me everything. I want to know."

"You have sustained serious injuries," Seven sighed. "You have broken several ribs and one of them has punctured your spleen."

"That sounds bad. Internal bleeding?"

"Yes, but I truthfully am unable to tell how severe it is."

"Well, I guess it's up to you to get us out of here."

"I do not want to leave you alone, but you are correct. I must evaluate the condition of the passage."

"Don't worry about me. I'm only sorry I can't help. Go on, I'll be right here when you get back."

Seven smiled, already missing Janeway's warm hand as it slipped from her own and trying hard to ignore the cold hand of dread that clutched her heart.

"The Captain is going to kill me," Kim exclaimed.

"Maim, maybe," Paris teased, "but I doubt she'll kill you."

"What's the problem, Harry?" Chakotay asked, turning in the command chair.

"Before she left, she told me to run a deep scan on the star this planet orbits. I was busy and didn't think to ask which spectrums to include. If I run a full spectrum it will take days…"

"…and that won't give you any time for shore leave." Chakotay chuckled. "I'll contact Captain Janeway and see what she wants."

"Interrupting the captain's leave, now that could get you killed," Tom taunted.

"As you were, Ensign Paris," he ordered affably. "Chakotay to Janeway." A second and third hail yielded no response. "Harry, scan the surface for the captain's comm signal."

"I'm not picking up anything, Commander. Wasn't she going to look at some caverns? If she's deep enough she we might have lost contact. I'm not picking up Seven's signal either."

"You're probably right. Run the scan of the star across the spectrum at five- percent intervals. That should satisfy the Captain and if it doesn't, I'll take the heat."

"Yes sir. Thank you."

It hadn't taken long for Seven to evaluate the situation. The tricorder indicated that at least 20 meters of the passage had collapse. Seven's attempt to use the tricorder to boost the comm signal failed. She went back to the cavern and explored its perimeter. There was no other access. The only way out was buried under tons of rock.

She had only been gone an hour, but in that time Janeway's condition had visibly worsened. Though she denied it, Janeway was in pain and showed signs of a fever beginning.

"The limited area and the incline make it impossible to use a phaser to clear the passage. I will have to remove the blockage by hand," Seven concluded her report. "Is there anything I can do for you before I begin?"

"No, I'll be fine." There was considerably less force behind Janeway's reassurance this time.

For a moment, Seven looked as if she would say something, then thought better of it. She gathered the tools that might be useful.

"I love you, Seven"

Seven set down the equipment, knelt beside Janeway, and carefully kissed her on the lips. "I love you, too. Your signal should reach me. Call if you need anything."

Chakotay stopped short in the doorway to the astrometrics lab, surprised to find B'Elanna already there. A hint of concern passed across her face, until she realized who the intruder was.

"Playing with Seven's toys while she's gone?" he teased.

B'Elanna snorted. "She's pretty territorial about this place, not that I blame her. She's put a lot of work into it. Still, of all the human characteristic she had to latch onto, why did one of them have to be that."

"Protecting territory is about as basic as animal behavior gets. You know, if you asked her, Seven would probably be more than happy to tell you everything you want to know about the lab and then some."

"There's the catch – I have to ask. Thanks, but I'll stick to following my own instincts. And what brings you here."

"Instinct, maybe," the tattoo across his forehead wrinkled as his brow furrowed. "I tried to contact the Captain earlier, but got no response. We've lost comm signals for both her and Seven. I know they were going to spend their leave in a cavern and that's probably why we can't raise them, but I thought maybe I could use the scanning array to check up on them – just to make sure."

"Maybe together we can figure out how to do it. The only one who really knows how this whole setup works is Seven."

"I think that's the closest I've ever heard you get to giving Seven a compliment."

"She's alright," B'Elanna admitted. "She's irritating, arrogant, pedantic and stubborn, but other than that she's a princess. For the love of Kayless, don't tell her I said anything nice."

"Right. These are the coordinated they transported to. It's as good a place to start as any."

Seven shifted a large stone, preparing to remove it from the pile, but before she could lift it the mass shifted, slowly at first, then in an avalanche of dust and debris. When the air cleared, she found herself no further ahead than she had been fifteen minutes earlier. There had been dozens of such rockslides over the last several hours; each one undoing the work that had gone before it. Each time Seven had begun again with dogged determination. This time was different. This time Seven dropped onto the grimy floor of the passage as heavy inhalations and exhalations of exertion turned into deep, body-wracking sobs of frustration.

Seven was experiencing an overwhelming need to returning to Janeway. She had forced herself to ignore the futility of trying to dig them out, but each minute that passed made her more cognitive of Janeway's struggle for survival.

She slowly got to her feet and went back down the passage to return to her beloved and suggest something that might save her life.

After one or two false starts, Chakotay and B'Elanna were able to re-calibrate the array for surface and subsurface scans, investigating a 25-kilometer radius around the transport site. They were able to pickup several life signs on the surface, none of them human, but nothing below the surface.

"Sensors just won't penetrate," B'Elanna sighed. "If they've gone in a cavern, there's no way to tell, although it would explain why we can't find them."

"Maybe they aren't even on the planet."

B'Elanna graced him with a skeptical look.

"Hey, we're in the Delta Quadrant. Stranger things have happened." Chakotay massaged the stubble on his chin. "Check for anything unusual."

B'Elanna set the controls. Her posture straightened as the data displayed.

Chakotay looked over her shoulder. "Could those emissions be produced by any natural phenomenon?" he asked in a grave tone.

"If they are, we're all in big trouble."

Janeway's form was almost motionless as Seven approached. She could hardly detect the shallow rise and fall of the chest. Janeway groaned and rolled her head in the direction of Seven's footsteps. She noticed that the water bottle had rolled out of reach. She retrieved it, propped Janeway against her and allowed a little moisture to trickle to her lips. Once Janeway recognized the wet relief, she sucked at it greedily.

"That tastes so good," she whispered. "I feel like I've spent my entire life willing that damn bottle to roll back over here."

"Quiet, Kathryn," Seven shushed her. "You have to save your strength. Why didn't you call me?"

"I always thought I'd die in space," Janeway said, ignoring the question, "but this is almost as good." Seven's eyes followed Janeway's eyes to the ceiling of the cavern. "Look at those beautiful tunnels. It's almost as if you could climb up them right out of here and into the heavens. Wishful thinking."

"Kathryn, listen to me. You don't have to die. Eventually, the crew of Voyager will find us. All we need to do is stay alive until they arrive."

"Three days – a lifetime," Janeway chuckled.

"I can survive three day and so can you if…" Seven hesitated. "If you allow me to inject you, my nanoprobes can help repair the damage."

"I can't let you do that." Janeway smiled.

"I can't let you leave me."

"You must." Janeway's eyelids fluttered. "This is all my fault," she mumbled, somewhat agitated. "I brought Voyager here. I brought you to these caverns. It was my fate and I just brought you all along." Janeway's speech was becoming incoherent. "I would not allow the Borg to assimilate me and I will not let you. I have the right to choose my own fate." She struggled to get the last words out before lapsing into unconsciousness. As she sagged into Seven's arms, her breathing becoming more ragged and horse.

Seven stroked the hair out of Janeway's eyes. She pressed her lips against her forehead and whispered, "Forgive me, Kathryn." Two tubules appeared from the ribbons of metal that embellished her left hand. They hovered over Janeway's throat. In the quiet stillness of the celestial cavern she repeated, "Forgive me."

The silence was broken by the sound of booted footsteps disturbing rocks in the passage. Seven looked up and saw shafts of light piercing the opening. Tuvok appeared first.

"Seven, what are you doing?" he asked.

"I am attempting to save the Captain's life." Her hand moved closer, tubules writhing and seeking.

"That will not be necessary."

"It will take hours to move her through the passage. She will not survive the journey."

"We have established a communication relay within the passage. We can transport her to the ship."

Seven vacillated for a moment then moved her hand away as the tubules retracted.

"Tuvok to bridge, transport Captain Janeway directly to sickbay as soon as you have a lock."

Janeway disappeared from Seven's arms leaving only empty air.

"Commander, how's the Captain doing?" Kim had beckoned Chakotay over to the mess hall table where he and Paris were sitting.

"Not well," Chakotay answered "The Doctor says there's only so much healing medicine can do, the rest the body has to take care of itself."

"She is going to make it?" Harry frowned.

"Doctor says he's not sure and when he says 'not sure' I can't help worrying. In fact, he said that this stage is very critical. It wouldn't take much to push her over the edge."

"Is there anything we can do?" Paris asked.

"There's nothing anyone can do."

"What about Seven?" Paris paused, waiting for an answer. The other two stared at him. "What? It's all over the ship that Seven was going to assimilate the Captain." Kim busied himself pushing food around his plate and Chakotay excused himself to continue about his business. "What! It isn't exactly a secret. Tuvok probably wouldn't have told, but he wasn't alone when he got to the cavern. The whole ship knows."

At that moment, the mess hall doors opened and Seven entered. Conversations suddenly died, then slowly resumed.

"You see," Paris whispered.

"Did it occur to you that they might be motivated to silence by sympathy. It must to be hard on Seven with Captain Janeway sick. Besides, you don't know what she was doing in that cavern or why."

"Well, it gives me the creeps."

"I'm not hungry. I'll catch you later." Harry was up and out the door before Tom knew what happened.

"He just never got over that crush."

The lights in the central portion of sickbay were dim. The only light in the alcove where Janeway rested was that spilling in from the main area and the faint illumination of the medical readouts. A figure moved in the shadows, edging closer and closer to Janeway's bed, making certain that the EMH was not active and no one else stood watch. It loomed over the indistinct but familiar features of the Captain's face for a moment, then a hand advanced toward her throat.

The alcove was suddenly flooded with light. A tall man stumbled back against the wall in a daze, dropping a hypospray near Janeway's shoulder. Janeway slowly sat up and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She waited for him to lower the hand he was using to shield his eyes from the light.

"Tannon," she gasped. "But the other day you saved my life."

"The other day I saved my skin. No one was supposed to see that little accident. Unfortunately, I had to save you to keep from being discovered."

"So you followed me to the planet's surface and planted the explosives that caused the cave-in."

"Yes, but my timing was off. Still, buried alive was as good as dead."

"I'm afraid the reports of my impending demise have been somewhat exaggerated," she said. The security team had arrived. They trained their weapons on Tannon. "Lieutenant Torres found residue from the explosion when she scanned the surface near the location we transported to. That's how they found us. That's how we knew someone was trying to kill me. If Chakotay had waited three day, until we failed to return from leave, the emissions would have dissipated. They might never have found us."

"Chakotay, that heathen, he ruined the whole thing."

"What I want to know is why."

Janeway took a step forward, but faltered, still weak from her injuries. Seven was immediately at her side placing a protective arm around her. Janeway reached across herself and patted Seven's hand, indicating that she was alright. Seven released her and backed away.

"Abomination!" he cried, eyes riveted on the spot where their hands had met.

"I thought as much," she said. "Take him to the brig."

A week had passed since Tannon's court-martial. The verdict had been a forgone conclusion. Since he'd been found out, Tannon freely admitted his crime, preaching the validity of his actions to anyone who would listen and showing no remorse except in his inability to successfully complete his mission. He was deemed a danger to the welfare of the ship and sentenced to stasis until such time as a permanent, non-lethal solution could be found.

Meanwhile, Janeway slowly came to the conclusion that things were not right between her and Seven. They had shared a few meals, usually at mid-shift in the mess hall, and Seven always managed to steer the conversation in the direction of business. She also had a ready excuse every time Janeway attempted to invite her to spend the night. At first it had been Janeway's need to rest and recover, but as she got better, Seven was forced to reach for more implausible reasons. For her part, Janeway had accepted the flimsy excuses without much consideration until one day Naomi Wildman greeted her in the hall and in the course of the conversation innocently asked, "Did you and Seven break up?" She assured the girl that they hadn't, but it caused her to reflect on T.S. Eliot and things that end "not with a bang but with a whimper."

She invited Seven to her quarters for dinner, refusing to take "No" for an answer. Seven arrived punctually, gave Janeway a peck on the mouth then seated herself at the table.

"I haven't prepared the meal yet. Unless you are very hungry, I thought we could talk first." Janeway watched closely and thought for a moment that Seven was going to say she was famished. Seven was never hungry.

"I have no immediate need for nutrients," she finally admitted. She moved from the table to a chair in the living area. "What would you like to discuss? I've made some significant progress toward increasing efficiency…"

"Not tonight," Janeway stated, holding up a hand. "I think we've had enough shop talk. I think we need to discuss what happened in the cavern." She saw Seven shrink at the mention of the word as her eyes became fixed on the floor.

"Is there some particular aspect you wish to explore?"

"Seven, do you still love me?"

Seven raised her head. "Of course I love you," she responded, wanting to say more but not knowing what, only that the response was lacking.

"Then stop being evasive." The word came out more harshly than Janeway had intended. She knelt in front of the chair in which Seven was seated and took hold of her hands. "I'm sorry, this is my fault, too. We need to talk about what happened. Can't you see what not talking is doing to us?"

Seven squeezed the hands that entwined in hers then raised them and pressed them against her brow. "Do you still love me?" Seven asked.

"Of course I do." Janeway wanted to fold the woman in her arm, to reassure her, but sensed that this was not the moment for affection. Instead she asked, "Did you doubt it?"

"Commander Tuvok must have told you what I was preparing to do when he entered the cavern. I was about to violate your express wishes."

"To be quite honest, I don't really remember what my express wishes were. What did I say?"

The memory was so deeply etched in her own mind that Seven blinked with confusion. "You forbid me to use my nanoprobes as a means to save your life. You implied that Voyager's situation and my presence in the cavern were your fate and therefore your responsibility and that you had a right to choose your own fate."

"I had hoped for something more profound as my dying words. All I managed were self-indulgent recriminations. There was more, what was it?"

"You said, 'I would not allow the Borg to assimilate me and I will not let you.'"

Janeway got up, sat on the arm of the chair and embraced Seven. "I'm sorry. I was disoriented. I didn't mean it."

"Are you sure? Humans are not always forthright in their dealings with one another. It sometimes requires delirium to demonstrate their true selves, even to themselves."

"When I compared your method to the assimilation practiced by the Borg it was not a reflection on the part of you that is still Borg. To me you are not Human or Borg. You are unique."

"If you were not incapacitated as you were then, if your maintained your present state of clarity and your life was endangered in a similar manner, would you allow me to use nanoprobes to prolong your life?"

"I don't know. It depends on whether or not I was ready to die."

"Please, explain."

"The last thing I remember about the cavern was being ready to die. I knew the first time you came back that I wasn't going to make it. You couldn't dig us out and Voyager wouldn't start looking for us until it was too late. I resigned myself. Maybe that was why I refused you so adamantly. There are circumstances under which I would not only allow you to do what you had planned, I would ask you to do it and be grateful. If I had to remain alive to save the crew or complete something only I could do…"

"But not to stay with me."

"It would be very tempting to say, 'Yes,' and very difficult to say, 'No.'"

"I thought survival was a primary instinct." Frustration deepened the twin creases at the bridge of Seven's nose. "Each time I think I understand what it is to be human, I find myself confounded."

"Don't feel bad. I've been human for over 40 years and I'm still muddling my way through it. Survival is important, but sometimes it is the way we live that is more important than life itself. Remember how Neelix was affected when we resurrected him."

"You would no longer be the same person. If the situation were reversed, would you allow me to die?"

"I hope that if that were your wish, that I would respect it and I think that deep inside you wanted to respect my choice. In the cavern, why didn't you say something to me sooner about the nanoprobes?"

"I was afraid that you would reject the idea. Perhaps I intended to leave you no choice."

"But something stopped you from using them."

"You mean Commander Tuvok."

"Tuvok couldn't have stopped you if you were that determined. You had no way of knowing if I would survive even after they found us, but as long as there was an opportunity to respect my wishes, a chance I might live without the nanoprobes, you were willing to take it."

"This had not occurred to me."

"You said it yourself, sometimes we hide the truth from ourselves."

"To let you go because I love you defies logic and yet I know that I love you, even though that love defies definition. It is frustrating."

"Falling in love with you was one of the last things I expected. I love the part of you that is Borg as much as I love the part that's Human. It all makes you what you are. There is a difference between the way I feel about the Borg and the way I feel about your borgness. Don’t let one fevered episode shake your faith in that."

"Yes, Kathryn." Seven relax, but there was still a tension in her posture.

"There's something more bothering you."

"Tannon."

"An unfortunate individual."

"He tried to kill you in the name of a deity."

"Actually, he was probably trying to kill us."

"Because we are women and take pleasure in each other."

"What a lovely way of putting it," Janeway said with a smile. "Yes, that was his motive."

"With all the knowledge of the Collective and my experience during my time on Voyager, I still find it difficult to comprehend the nature of religion, especially one that would encourage such an act."

"Tannon's actions had more to do with a lack of sanity than belief in religion. The religion he professes to follow was begun by a man who preached love and acceptance. Tannon and others like him pervert the words to satisfy their own purposes."

"If they feel this way about intimacies between women, how do they react to the interrelations of human and alien species?"

"I recall hearing someone use a textual passage referring to 'lying with beasts.' Needless to say, very few of these people became Federation diplomats." Janeway laughed at the notion of Vulcans being compared to dogs and sheep. The sound was delicious to Seven's ears, provoking a need for release. She kissed Janeway with a passion that had lost its way but now knew the comfort of returning home. Seven pulled her off the arm of the chair and into the seat beside her. Janeway inhaled quickly and moaned, but it was not an expression of desire. Seven backed away.

"I'm sorry, darling," she said, reaching out to Seven. "I'm afraid I'm still a little tender from the accident. Maybe later we can trying again if we're very gentle."

Seven kissed Janeway again, this time barely brushing lips. "I shall most willingly comply."

"Right now, I need food."

"Indeed," Seven remarked with more enthusiasm than usual. Janeway looked at her quizzically. "Anticipation of this meeting left me unsettled. I have not eaten all day."

"Then let's get you fed."

"There is one other thing," Seven said as she crawled out of the chair and turned to help Janeway. "There have been some rumors circulating among the crew regarding the events in the cavern and my ability to assimilate."

"I'd heard. I'm not sure what to do about the situation."

"I would like to deal with it in my own way."

"They used me," Paris protested. "Chakotay and Harry did this big song and dance about Janeway being on her last legs and all the time it was just a set up to catch Tannon."

"So they didn't let you in on it," B'Elanna replied. "They wanted it to look real."

"Are you saying I couldn't have carried it off?"

"Tom, get over it."

"And another thing. Isn't it going to be a little weird having Tannon in stasis?"

"You'd rather have him walking around the ship?"

"No, I think we have enough loose cannons rolling around the halls as it is."

"For instance?"

"Seven. You heard about the cavern. How am I supposed to act around her after something like that."

"The same as you did before."

"Easy for you to say. You two never did get along. I can't just say 'Hi, Seven, how ya doing?' You know what I feel like saying? 'Hey, Seven, feel like assimilating anyone today?'"

"No, I do not," Seven stated as she brushed by him, "but if I get the urge I will keep you in mind." She continued down the hall with her usual purposeful strides.

"You knew she was there," Paris accused. B'Elanna smiled. Tom's annoyance turned to concern as a thought hit him. "She's kidding, right?"

B'Elanna slapped him on the shoulder and continued to smile as she walked away.